evidence of God's greatness.

I'm not going to lie, this past week was a battle.  But, God is ever so victorious and His timing is impeccable.

I had ideas to quit support-raising and just drop out of the program.  I was so discouraged and caught up in my works: I felt guilty that I had not done my part.  Why would God bless me if I hadn't done anything?

Thursday night.  God led me to pray.  He beckoned me in to pray.  It was amazing.  He taught me that I am able to ask God for my desires only because of Jesus.  If I stand on my own righteousness, I fall short.  If I stand on my own works, I fall short.  I am unable.  But God looks at me and sees Jesus.  I can boldly stand in front of God because of Jesus Christ.

Praise God that He is bigger than my laziness, fear and everything.  Praise God.  He led me to pray.  He taught me how to pray boldly.  I cried out to God on Thursday that I am unworthy, but I stand before God washed in Jesus' blood.  I can ask of God my desires because I am clean and I am His daughter.  And I declared: God, you need to move because I cannot do it.  You need to move and give me $1500 because Your glory needs to be seen.  People need to see, I need to see, that God you are so much bigger than my mistakes.  You still love us despite our mistakes.  You still love us even if I don't follow my promises and day to day plans.  You have already redeemed us.  Just as Moses demanded to see the glory of God, I was taught that we can do that too.  God wants us to seek Him for everything.

Praise God.

On Friday night:

$500: I met with this friend on Thursday out of the blue.  She wanted to meet with me.  And I was struggling that day, and without meaning to, I spilled out everything.  How I felt, what I was going through, that I was so tired of having to have faith.  At the end, my Spirit despite it all still wanted to Praise God.  I said to her, "I don't want pity, God is still good."  That was not me.  That was Holy Spirit.  She tells me to give her a support letter, but I didn't think about it.  I didn't think that she would or could.  She would tell me later that during our conversation, she was convicted by God to support me.  That night, she contacted her mom and shared her conviction.  They hung up and prayed.  After prayer, they called each other again, seeing if her mom agreed, and then to how much.  She told me that when they shared the amount that God convicted them with, it was the same: $500.  Friday night, I receive a letter with a verse.

They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness.  I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for Him." The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the ones who seeks Him. -Lamentations 3:23-25

Inside was $500.


$200: I met with my friend Saturday morning.  He tells me that Friday night, when he was talking to God, he was convicted by God to give.  "I haven't been giving offering at my church.  When I was praying about it, God told me to give the money to you."

It's humbling because its not me.  It's not through pity, it's God touches. Crazy.  Now, I'm so excited. So so excited.

Thursday night: I only had my $200 initial deposit (which is also God's crazy timing story)

Saturday: $900.

God is big. So mighty. So strong.

Majesty, Majesty. Your Grace has found me just as I am, Empty-handed, but alive in your hands.
-Majesty: Delirious?